Ah yes, the classic “let me show you a verse” move.
I’ve written enough articles over the last few months that I now get readers coming to my blog off of random Google searches. Sometimes they make sense, others not so much, and a few make me laugh. One particular search caught my eye the other day: “how to meet Reformed men.” Apparently there is at least one single Christian woman out there, looking for a man with a sound grasp of the doctrines of grace. Now, I’m not sure she found what she was looking for here, but in the spirit of brotherly love, I thought I’d list a few helpful, possibly humorous, suggestions from friends and family on “how to meet Reformed men”:
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- Go to a local Reformed church and look for one.
- If no Reformed church is available, look for the guy in the back of your local non-denominational church, furiously writing notes during the sermon in order to write the pastor an email filled with corrections.
- In that same church, mention words like “covenant”, “doctrine”, “election”, or “fatherly hand” in conversations with any single men and look for the twinkle in their eyes. (HT: Sean McLeish)
- Frequent local coffee shops with a copy of Calvin’s Institutes lying out on the table. Make sure you’ve read some of it, though, and include sufficient highlights and underlining.
- Repeat #4 in local breweries and pubs (unless Baptist).
- Move to Louisville, walk around Southern’s campus without a wedding ring on. (Reformed Baptist; HT Lauren Rambo)
- For those favoring the online approach, ReformedSingles.com offers to fill the gap. Unlike other dating sites this is a place where: “Our members are prepared for marriage by reading a wide variety of articles on marriage, dating pitfalls, courtship, divorce and remarriage, and more. Our Members’ identities have been verified by their pastor so people you meet really are who they say they are. Finally, our members know that their futures are predestined by our heavenly Father and rest in His kind hands.” (HT: Alan Noble)
Although I’ve limited myself to 7 tips, on biblical grounds, I’m sure our sisters would love some more (appropriate) suggestions from the readership in the comments. Blessings on the search.
Soli Deo Gloria
(Image Credit: Online For Love)
Reformedish 
#2 reminds me of someone…
Dude, I didn’t include your name. 😉
Is Reformed Singles real or a joke? I can’t tell, but it is highly humorous.
Oh that’s a thing.
It does no longer exsist. I tried to make an account impossible.
Hi
I would like to let you know of a new reformed singles web site called TulipSingles.com. Would love to talk to you more about it.
http://Www.tulipsingles.com
Tim…
Yes… it’s real but RS went away many years ago… but Sovereign Grace Singles (.com) has been active since January of 2005!
Check it out!
Dean
Chesterton said a sane man was one who could have comedy in his head and tragedy in his heart.
It was a parody, for sure, but it’s sad. I think I’ve lost 20 years off my life from spasms, heart pains and convulsions caused by christian-mingle commercials. “Do you want to hear really good news?!”, I hope it’s someone to put me down before I hear the rest of the commercial.
Cal
Ha! Seriously, commercials on Christian radio stations are the worst. Playing the already-cheesy worship music behind a dating site bringing out the already-too-erotic elements in the song just layers too many levels of Christian sentimentality and consumerism.
like.
Cal, Thanks to ChristianMingle commercial on a snow day during a very lonely season when I was at a small church plant surrounded only by families I quickly met the love of my life, God’s perfect fit for me! Must admit, I am rather thankful for their cheesy commercials!!! 😉
Thanks to “a”…
1.5 years of marital bless to count! 🙂
Cal… it’s real but RS went away many years ago… but Sovereign Grace Singles (.com) has been active since January of 2005!
Check it out!
Dean
Are you sure those “girls” asking for advice on where to find Reformed Men weren’t guys posing as girls in order to advertise where they want Reformed girls to look? lol Most single reformed guys I know are resigned to the reality that they will be in a situation where they will be converting their future or actual spouse to a 5pointer – I think most guys I know would find that fun and a badge of honor to have conquered their woman theologically.
Yeah, and one of the reasons some Reformed guys are single is because they talk about “conquering” their women in any sense. 😉
Bahahaha! Amen!
Well said! Nobody, and I mean NOBODY, should plan on marrying someone they have to then “fix” or change!
This could be true. On the other hand, I am sure there are some reformed women wondering about the same thing. 😛
In a way that’s sad. I sometimes feel like that’s the reason why I’m still single. I mean, do reformed single guys in my country and around my age exist or not? I would have to think perhaps not; either that or they are too busy trying to ‘convert’ their non-reformed girls to reformed theology to think about using their initiative to find me.
Aussie…
Yes…
We totally redid a website called Sovereign Grace Singles (.com) has been active since January of 2005!
There are Aussie’s there!
Check it out!
Dean
Conquer their woman theologically bahaha. I guess I could see how someone would be offended by that but I think it’s actually kinda sexy. 👀
Add a 7a to it: Sovereign Grace Singles. Look them up.
I agree, BlackCalvinist. http://www.sovereigngracesingles.com I know it works, as our daughter met a wonderful man on there–so right for each other!!!. Their wedding was in April.
Or you can have had very unsavory experiences from that site. VERY UNSAVORY. God is in control. There is no right answer on how He brings your mate into your life. HE WORKS on an intimately individual basis with each of His people.
Thanks BC!!
Dean
PS… Reformed Singles went away many years ago… but Sovereign Grace Singles (.com) has been active since January of 2005!
Check it out!
Dean
Hey, this is serious business. Chuckle away from the position of marriage or even as the man who is the one in the hunting position; but the shoe will someday be on the other foot as you look at your teenaged daughters and wonder this very question.
Arranged marriages start sounding good 😉
I have to admit that I tend to be seen as the home schooled nerd that knows more theology than the senior pastor at my church, so this blog title really caught my eye! =) And even though I’m a 17 yr. old female who should care very much (according to this world) about dating and guys, there are definitely times I wish my marriage had been arranged!
You don’t choose reformed men. Reformed men choose you.
Hahaha.
Okay, I’ll that one.
Nicely said, Andrew. This is how I came to be married to a reformed man.
hahaha wow! I wish for that to happen!
I just put the word reformed on my Christianmingle profile about three times. My (totally reformed) boyfriend of just over a year says it was the first thing that he noticed, other than my picture. 🙂 he “picked me up” with a line about John McArthur.
This is fantastic. As a single Reformed girl, I welcome the suggestions and recognize God’s sovereignty in providing them. 😉
Angie….
Yes… Sovereign Grace Singles (.com) has been active since January of 2005!
Check it out!
Dean
Reblogged this on thegirlandthelight and commented:
Funny AND helpful. Perfect.
I almost coughed up a tulip laughing. The thing is, most reformed men I know are already married.
Most reform women I know are ether married or are not family minded.
family minded? meaning they aren’t interested in marriage?
Personally, I start my online dating searches by looking for men going by their first two initials… I’m convinced it means something deeply theological 🙂
These are actually quite helpful in all honesty! I will start working on #5 immediately.
So Are you looking for someone deeply theological? right?
Dude, this was a joke post.
It is hard for Reformed men to Find a good Christian woman let alone a Reformed one. In WI anyway. So how about creating an article how to meet Reformed women?
that would be an excellent Idea Madame
Brandon…
Sovereign Grace Singles (.com) has been active since January of 2005!
Check it out!
Dean
I’m a (single and never married) Reformed Christian woman, if anyone’s interested! 🙂
Oh, and I thought this post was great! Super funny!
Interesting.
Hello April I am a Single and Reformed Young Man, that want to Know a Godly women
Let me know if you would like to try, I mean, just to be friends, and speak, just that, We could be using maybe… facebook, or gmail, or sovereigngracesingles.com whatever. What do you say, I am 28 years old.God bless you.
Bye
I think that this website must have a chatrooms, Derek, and that is a great topic, there are more and more Reformed Christians but… it is still difficult to find reformed single Christian in some areas.
I’m a single, reformed, covenant loving gal who has never been married and looking for a man that can lead me and assist in my spiritual growth. I’m family oriented and seeking a lifelong partner. 🙂
Well, you should know that not all “Reformed men” are white or make a lot of money or even live State side. The reason I’m saying that is because I’m not sure if “Reformed girls” consider the likelihood of those circumstances converging when they look for a spouse. A lot of times, those requirements qualify the kind of “Reformed men” that they’re actually looking for. But, that’s just me thinking. I don’t know how true or valid my argument really is. Feel free to correct me.
I think you pose a valid point but I think that point can be made as well for reformed men seeking a certain type of reformed woman. You mention that reformed women look for men with money or that they be a certain complexion but men do the same thing by wanting a certain type of women whether it be a woman that looks a certain way or is more home/stay at home wife type then a professional. Now are these preferences sinful or bad, no. But when they outweigh the theological compatibility, I think that is when we are treading some pretty serious waters. And that’s just my opinion too. Do you find yourself in that category of being overly picky with spouse seeking?
Sovereign Grace Singles (.com) has been active since January of 2005!
Check it out!
Dean
I’d prefer to answer those questions in person or on the phone, rather than pouring my heart out on the internet. Feel free to send an email to this address: workinprogress@disposableinbox.com and we can figure out how we can do this conversation over the phone.
Sincerely.
Actually, don’t do that; that’s not safe at all. Should you choose to get in touch with me, use this instead: 5d34s@notsharingmy.info
Hi WorkinProgress, I would like to talk more but am unsure of the emails you’ve given me as they seem to either not work or seem shady. If you want to talk, we’ll have to figure out another way to communicate or create a legit email?
Yeah, I agree. I created a less obscure email address; here you go: obscureemailaddress001@gmail.com
Hey Reformed_girl,
It’s your turn.
No. 2 Got me laughing. From now on I’ll begin my search at the back of Church 😉
That made me laugh as well 🙂
Lol this is a cute post. A lot of good practical advice though.
hahahaha… this is really good!
Hmmm I guess a good place to start.
Reformed Singles went away many years ago… but Sovereign Grace Singles (.com) has been active since January of 2005!
Check it out!
Dean