What Marriage Is All About


Note the emotional tenor conveyed by the underline and punctuation. My wife is an expressive writer.

It’s February now, so thoughts of romance and love are in the air. As I think about my sweet McKenna, I’ve realized that great moments have not been lacking in our marriage. She’s kinda the best for all sorts of reasons–one of which is her ability to constantly surprise me.

This was easily one of my favorites so far.

Admittedly I’ve only been at it a year and a half, but waking up to find this lovely little note on a Sunday morning (right before I had to get ready for church) was a humorous chance to be what I’m supposed to be as a husband–a sacrificial servant who dies to himself for the sake of his wife. (Eph. 5) And there was joy in that.

Obviously, killing one cockroach in the morning before work isn’t an extreme “death to self” moment. Yes, it was a truly GINORMOUS beast and put up a serious fight. At most though, I had to simply swallow the inconvenience of time wasted on a busy Sunday morning. Still, most of the time love looks like the little things. Yes, the dates, the romance, the big decisions, and all of the normal things that we focus on in a marriage are key, important, and foundational. And so is taking out the trash when she asks you the first time and cleaning up beard trimmings in the sink, even when you’d rather just sit down and watch TV, or read a book–without whining.

In the end, it’s through the little acts of daily faithfulness and service that we honor God in our marriages.

As we look towards Valentine’s Day this month, a word to husbands: yeah, plan out the big date. Make it romantic–you know, put on nice clothes and stuff. Buy the flowers–make ’em classy. Try going to a restaurant that doesn’t wrap its food in foil. And while you’re at it, kill a bug or two, make sure your towel isn’t on the floor, vaccum something–seek out the joy of serving her. I’m not great at this, but by the grace of God, I want to get better.

Soli Deo Gloria

5 thoughts on “What Marriage Is All About

  1. I just gave my “roach killer” of almost 40 yrs the biggest hug, like I do at every opportunity. Blessings, to both you and McKenna.

  2. This brought me back to my first year of marriage. We lived in an apartment that, because of bad neighbours, became infested – I mean INFESTED – with roaches.

    Love does indeed kill bugs.

    Just tell your wife one thing. A vacuum won’t kill/stop a roach! It might solve the problem in the short term but they could live or lay eggs in the vacuum! Then they go wherever the vacuum goes. When we moved, we took the buggers with us! Be warned!

    • Haha! Thanks for the tip. Yeah, I killed and flushed it. The sewage now claims the beast. What’s weird is that we’ve never seen anything like it again. Yeah, a spider here and there, but it was just so out of nowhere it took us by surprise.

  3. Pingback: Weddings: Why they can be hurtful and beautiful all at the same time. | thebrightblush

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